Urban Drool

Have yourselves a Merry one!!

Well.

Just got back from 3 days in NYC.

Wow.

I have not slept since Saturday night (we decided that the best way to drive home from NYC to Cleveland involved a little side trip through Delaware. True Story. I’m sure it will seem all “haha” in a few years time, but right now? Not so much) Hence, wee snippets are all I can muster. But muster them I must, for the sake of posterity.

-slept at great friends apartment in Astoria where there is a strippers pole in the kitchen. And their two cats who cat-er-waul all freaking night long

-navigating cumbersome stroller through the subway nooks n’crannies until great friend tactfully pointed out the “service entrance”

-almost got to meet MetroDad. That’s OK, MD, we’ll catch ya in a few months when we come back

-Had drinks with Kathleen Turner at a fancy-pants bar in the AOL Time Warner Building. She thought my baby was adorable (of course)

-p.s… even older, wrinkled, sans makeup and slightly chubby, Kathleen Turner is still smokin’ hot. It’s the voice. “She’s not bad, she’s just drawn that way”

-Gross Thai food at a supposedly great Thai place in Queens. Not so much with the great. More like “barely able to not vomit it back up”

-Ran into my boss’ son and his dog while strolling through Central Park. Which: odd. And: random.

-FAO Schwartz and nutcracker soldiers and princesses and Curious George and my baby smiling and squeeing and the Boy and I are the world’s BEST parents

-The best hot chocolate I have ever drunk…thank you Bottega del Vino

-The Boy spoiled me and I got me a new fall/winter wool pea coat (!), purty necklace and pair o’ sunglasses

-Rosa Mexicana. At-table-side made guacamole. Crabmeat empanadas. Pomegranate margaritas. Chocolate soufflé. Oh my freaking God.

-Lion King. Sobbed through the entire opening number. Oh my freaking God x 2.

-Stumbling with da Boy through the dark streets of Manhattan, subways and breakdancers, slightly buzzed and speaking of lovely things, getting back to our Pickle.

-da Pickle. Who totally dug New York.

-Battery Park and a view of the Statute from the S.I. Ferry and a random Greek container ship that caused much excitement in my fellow travelers (for reasons I still don’t totally comprehend, but that’s OK)

-12 hours to get back home. Did I mention the New York to Cleveland via a brief tour of Delaware route? No? I didn’t?

Hi.

I'm not going to be posting for a bit. Just for a bit!

There's just way too much going on right now, and I think I need to focus my energies into searching for a new job, keeping myself from getting fired from my old job, and enjoying my favorite time of the year with my favorite girl.

But I will be reading and commenting every single day.

Be back soon, I hope. In a few weeks, anyway.

In the meantime, I leave you with this little monkey...

Almost every Monday my boss hands me $20 and instructs me to trot across the street to the Panera to buy bagels/muffins/assorted saturated-fat laden wonderfulness for the office.

I usually do not mind this little task, what with the deliciously warm and cinnamon-scented air of the store.

But the store is staffed almost entirely by young(er) women between the ages of 21 and 30.

Who all, without fail, every time I am there, insist on calling me "Ma'am."

When did I become a Ma'am?

Ma'am is 42 years old with 2 cranky pre-teens, trying to load the groceries into the back of her Honda CRV ("do you need any help with those bags, Ma'am?")

Ma'am is 51 years old, beaming with joy at the sight of her son graduating from high school ("you must be so proud of Troy, Ma'am")

Ma'am is the skeptical single mom, meeting her 17 year old daughter's boyfriend for the first time ("it's nice to finally meet you, Ma'am")

Ma'am is 73 years old, trying to get through the doorway of a Cracker Barrel while navigating her way with an absurdly large handbag and a too-long raincoat draped over her arm ("here, let me get that door for you Ma'am")

Is Ma'am one of the very same age group as the Panera girls themselves...youthful and full of vinegar at a spritely 29 years of age?

Is Ma'am's hair always pulled back in a ponytail with a scrunchtie? Is Ma'am's cell phone bright pink and shiny with glitter?

Is Ma'am's husband young and hot and just the right combination of Johnny Depp, Jack Nicholson and Kevin Smith?

I guess so.

To this I can only say: When the fuck did this happen?